Being the “black sheep” of my family has taught me more about identity, courage, and purpose than any classroom ever could.
For a long time, I tried to fit into the mold I was raised in—the beliefs, expectations, and patterns that were passed down as “just the way things are.” But deep down, I knew something was off. I wanted more. I thought differently. I felt differently. And because of that, I was often misunderstood.
What I’ve learned is this: You are allowed to become someone beyond who you were raised to be.
When “Normal” Isn’t Your Normal
I realized many years ago that my family’s version of “normal” was not my own.
The way we were conditioned to see the world—how we viewed success, relationships, faith, money, and even our own worth—didn’t fully align with the woman I was becoming. I began to understand that:
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I could love my family and still outgrow certain mindsets.
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I could honor my roots and choose a different route.
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I could respect where I came from and still reach for more.
There is more to my life than just what I learned at home. The world is big.
When you start thinking for yourself, people may label you as difficult, rebellious, or “the black sheep.” But often, that just means you’re the one brave enough to question generational patterns.
Choosing Identity Over Expectations
One of my greatest fears was waking up one day full of regret—realizing I lived my life based on what others said about me, instead of who I knew I was called to be.
So I made a decision:
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I would no longer shrink to keep others comfortable.
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I would no longer allow other people’s fears to define my future.
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I would no longer confuse family expectations with my God-given identity.
There is more to life than what you were taught in youth. There is a big world outside of familiar streets, family traditions, and limiting beliefs. And when you step into that world with self-awareness and discernment, you start to see possibilities you were never told existed.
The Power of Self-Awareness and Discernment
Being the black sheep has a hidden gift: it pushes you to study yourself.
You start asking hard questions:
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Who am I outside of my last name?
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What do I believe, not just what I was told to believe?
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What type of life do I want to create—for myself and the generations after me?
This is where self-awareness and discernment meet. Self-awareness helps you understand your patterns, strengths, and triggers. Discernment helps you recognize what (and who) aligns with your purpose.
Together, they give you permission to:
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Break cycles instead of repeating them.
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Set boundaries instead of staying silent.
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Walk in authenticity instead of performance.
From “Black Sheep” to Pattern Breaker
I no longer see “black sheep” as an insult.
To me, it’s a sign that:
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You think differently.
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You see differently.
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You are called to live differently.
Sometimes the one who doesn’t fit in is the one who was never meant to. They were meant to lead, disrupt, heal, and rebuild.
If you’ve ever felt like the black sheep, I want you to know this: there is nothing wrong with you for wanting more. There is nothing wrong with you for stepping away from unhealthy norms. And there is definitely nothing wrong with you for choosing healing, growth, and a bigger vision for your life.
About Gift of Discernment (G.O.D.) LLC
Through Gift of Discernment (G.O.D.) LLC, I help individuals and professionals grow mentally, emotionally, and spiritually—so they can step out of old conditioning and into a purpose-driven life.
It’s not just about success. It’s about clarity, courage, and calling.
If my story resonates with you, you’re not alone—and you’re not crazy. You might just be the one chosen to think differently so your family, community, or future generations don’t have to stay stuck.
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