Over the last fifteen years, I have learned a lot about the military. In the beginning of my journey, I was a bit confused. Traveling across the country, I encountered many military personnel. Covertly, after working with Veterans Affairs, I now believe some simply wanted to be sure I was fully awake.
Many of the nurses I worked with thought I was doing something wrong to gain popularity. The truth is, I would pray and wish people well silently. I would actively listen to their problems and offer comfort. Not everyone needs to be “fixed” — many just need an active, compassionate ear.
“In all thy getting, get understanding.”
Understanding PTSD became a deep desire of mine after working with military people. I would research different things to better comprehend how those exposed to different cultures, faiths, and countries see the world from a broader perspective. They are very proud men and women.
From meeting military members, intelligence officials, Pentagon employees, and other government professionals in the D.C. area, I came to discover they saw I was no threat. I had some of the most profound conversations in D.C. with Pentagon employees. I attended President George H. W. Bush’s memorial service in D.C.—a beautiful experience. Many members of the Secret Service were kind and friendly toward me.
If a woman loving God is seen as a threat, something is wrong with people’s minds.
Over the last fifteen years, I believe there were those who wanted to be sure I was awake. There is no crime in being conscious and aware when you have good intentions toward others. Doing the wrong thing is easy; being honest and having integrity when no one is looking is the moral compass I live by.
Many years ago, I was a whistleblower. I was once asked by the FBI in Atlanta, “Are you trying to break the government?” The answer is no. There were many people I worked with at the time who did not believe in God. I respect that. However, if men and women fought for Constitutional rights, then I also have the freedom to pray for them if I choose, and if they ask.
My friend Isaiah in New York once told me, “Stay out of Black churches.” Maybe, in a way, he was trying to protect me from certain pastors, because I once was blind, but now I see. Religion can make people do foolish things. Christianity is my foundation and always will be—whether I attend church or not. I feed my own soul, because my relationship with God is solid.
Somehow, I believe all of those experiences were leading me deeper into my purpose.
I recall a military guy saying, “I don’t know if we are hurting her or helping her.” I believe everything does work together for the good of those who love God. At one point, I had a dream of becoming the head of the Department of Veterans Affairs. I understand that culture now more than ever.
I see that, after having been active duty, many do not particularly care for large crowds. I see that constant environmental stimulation is not always a positive thing—especially in a society where some people do foolish things for no cause. With all our gaining, God says to gain understanding.
I am not yet where God is taking me, but I believe I am on my way. I choose to walk by faith, not fear.
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